Not so long ago I heard part of a conversation. She didn't know I was listening.
I overheard her asking her husband in sorrow? frustration? desperation? all of it...
"Am I just supposed to keep letting you beat me? Am I just supposed to keep letting you cheat on me?"
To see this couple together you wouldn't have thought this abuse was going on.
Even if some of the emotional abuse was able to be seen, most of the time people write it off as,
"Maybe he's having a bad day."
Please hear me. People all around you every day are stuck in places in life they aren't telling you about. Sometimes out of survival they can't share it. Sometimes tricks of the enemy happen as he tries to get a foothold with a spirit of fear trying to choke the courage out of people so they don't think they can share. If people rebuke it then the spirit of fear has to leave them alone. God says so. When we speak The Name of Jesus the devil trembles in fear. If anything can make people stay silent then the abuse has room to continue.
This is why the way you treat someone in EVERY interaction matters so very much.
Every person you meet MAY be fighting a life or death situation.
Someone else told me that someone called the police to report this child's dad. Even the moment the police were at the door, when her dad turned and looked at her mom, she said her mom could see,
I've heard this has happened in several situations. Calling the police is not always the answer.
YOUR prayers can bring Spiritual help right into the middle where you or the police can't reach.
God says He is a VERY PRESENT Help in times of trouble.
The police leave and she's left in a worse situation whether it's emotional, physical or whatever else is going on. The kids are possibly facing the same hatred. Please pray for discernment whether to call someone or not. I know you would not want to cause more harm to someone. Also I'm never going to tell you not to call. I am just begging you to pray for discernment.
But it IS a very good idea to make a paper trail. Over the past year and a half I've learned this from talking with many legal professionals and domestic violence counselors and police.
Perhaps you can pray about the best moment to just let her know quietly that you are available to talk if she ever needs to. You don't actually have to mention that you think something may be going on.
Telling someone is very scary. She does not need your heavy judgement piled on top of the battles you don't even know she's been barely surviving. That is not helpful.
Even if your eyes haven't seen what she's telling you,
Some people are very covert in their actions.
You actually probably did hear or see something but what you saw is a moment of a thousand moments of a hell you know nothing about.
I've been there too. I wondered if I should give gas money to a woman who needed to put healthy space between her and her drunk husband. I prayed and gave her money. It's not my job to decide for her if she's going or staying. She ended up going back to him and he changed some of his ways but I'm not even going to talk about the other destructive, unhealthy things going on there.
You can't make someone leave and you can't make someone stay. That isn't your job. There's a high price to pay either way and you're not the one paying it.
Sometimes you can try to only fight fair using "I feel" statements instead of "You always." You can give all you know how to give and empty yourself into someone's life. You can pray. You can hope. You can wish. And sometimes it just isn't ever going to be enough. I pray when this happens as it sometimes does that you find God still has purpose and He still gives peace in the middle of it even when things don't turn out as everyone wanted them to. Your worth is found in Him and not in what someone isn't able to see about you or in you. He still redeems. Every tear is counted by God and every situation can be used for His Divine purpose. Every one. He is still worthy to be praised.
Since you may not know who needs this help maybe you can just make it a habit to pray over every person who interacts with your day. You can do this all day long or at the beginning or at night or all of that.
Just please do it. Someone's life may depend on it.
My daughters and I believe God is doing work with us to help other people safely get away from unhealthy situations and have a safe place to breathe and heal and work. Please pray with us and we ask for God-sized financial support also. If you wonder how much will help, we know God did miracles of abundance with just a few loaves of bread and fish. He is the same yesterday, today, and forever. He still does incredible things with any size offering.
Currently we are praying for 3 new computers and 3 new phones for us and also vehicle repairs. We have PhotoShop and other software to use to use but need better computers to support the work. We are also praying for a vinyl cutter to make signs to sell for income. We ask and believe God is somehow answering our prayers in a safe, healthy way.
We feel we are still to be waiting in faith in northwest Washington for God to open doors for this work in Alaska He's given me visions and dreams about over the past 7 years. He's been teaching us every day how to better support people who need support.
In prayer this was placed on my heart:
You might never know how far-reaching you faith is. Be still and trust in The Lord to do what only He can do and that is enough.
It's simple, really. When it's all about Him, the fool I look like means almost nothing in the eternal view of what I believe He is doing with me. This takes the pressure off me and keeps the focus on Him, which is where it belongs. He is more than able.
In Genesis 19 angels struck men blind so they could not find the door. I pray this over wherever my children and I feel called to stay and over the work we feel called to do.